I just read a quote by Seth Godin that reminded me of how angry my wife makes me. Ok, let me clarify, my wife does not make me mad, I make myself mad because I ask her opinion and when her opinion does not jibe with mine I get mad. She will reiterate what Godin says,
Don’t measure anything unless the data helps you make a better decision or change your actions. If you’re not prepared to change your diet or your workouts, don’t get on the scale.
My wife says, “if you don’t want my opinion, don’t ask”. So, if I have an idea I am really committed to and I don’t want to change it, I don’t ask my wife anymore, but when I am unsure and need direction, she is a great sounding board. But, there are some other questions youth workers should not ask if they don’t want to change.
Consider the the questions you ask after service:
How was my talk?
What did you think of the worship?
How do think things went tonight?
Whether I ask these questions of our staff, our guests, our kids, or myself, I usually make sure it was a fairly decent night before I ask it so that the bow back is minimal. If I am to grow as a leader, I should be ready to put every element of the ministry on the scale as well as myself. We should ask tough questions :
1. When we know the night was not very good or some drama is going on.
Looking at our meeting from stained glass eyes won’t help us in the end. We have to have the courage to ask the hard questions during good and bad times.
2. Of our critics as well as our friends so we can get a 360 perspective on the ministry.
I am not saying we invite unwanted or undue trouble or criticism but we have to ask. People can be critical and love us. Critics are, by their nature, critical thinkers, they want the best from us and the ministry. Trust your gut and pray about who you should ask what questions.
3. Of our most brutally honest critic, God.
No one want more for us than God. He seeks our best and won’t emotional (or otherwise) beat us up. In our prayer time and reading, let’s be listening to the Holy Spirit as He gently nudges, convicts,and encourages us.
Your Turn
When was the last time you “stepped on the scale”?
Who is on your list of critical thinkers?
When was the last time God showed you some changes you needed to make that you were resistant to? How did you respond?
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.