Put A Label On It

Why don’t you just say it?

“I have a problem.”

“I need help.”

“I’m struggling.”

“I can’t figure this out.”

“This is driving me crazy!”

:I have something stirring inside of me.”

Just say it,

“I don’t have a plan”

“I need help with my volunteers”

“I need help planning stuff”

“I need more discipline in my personal life”

“I have an idea I can’t seem to get out’

I’ve heard it said, you can’t solve a problem until you’ll you put a label on it.

So, put a label on it and then let me use my 30 years of ministry experience to help you solve it. 

Do I Need A Mentor or A Coach?

Have you been asking, “Do I need a ministry mentor or a coach?” I have been in full time  ministry for 25 years and I still ask that question. I am working through the process for myself and thought I’d pass on what I am learning.

What’s the difference between a mentor and coach? I think a mentor is someone who  who is committed, long term to helping people get the bet out of the their life. A coach, on the other hand, looks at what you’re “putting on the field”, the x;s and o’s,  and offers an opinion about whether our goals and our plan/strategy match up. Essentially, I think mentors work inside out and a coach works outside in.

One way I determine if I need a mentor or a coach is to listen to my own whining. Yes, our sighs, groaning, and questions can tell us what we need,

Mentor Type Questions

1. Why do I feel so directionless?

2. Why aren’t my goals making me happy?

3. What do I do in this situation?

4. What do I do with this failure?

5. Who will walk with me through this thing?

Mentoring is a two way street. We have to risk something to have a mentoring relationship. We have to be honest about where we are in life. If we’re saying that “no one will mentor me”  it might be because we don’t want a mentor, we just want someone to fix us.

Coaching Type Questions

1. How do I set up my small groups?

2. Where do I reach teens?

3. When should I plan my outreach?

4. Why should I do small groups instead of large weekly meetings?

Coaching is about mechanics. There may be some mentoring involved in your coaching but it’s mostly about technique, like a quarterback coach working on the three step drop or how to slide out of the pocket so you don’t get crushed by a linebacker.

In the end, there’s some coaching in mentoring and some mentoring in coaching. The questions becomes. “Which of these do I need in my life right now?” and “Where can I find one?”

We’ll discuss this more in my week long focus on mentoring and coaching.

Which of these roles do you think you need  in your life right now?

What are the questions you have been whining about asking yourself?

If you are needing a ministry mentor/coach, I can put my 25 plus years in youth ministry to work for you. Check out my deal here

Click HERE for the next post in this series: Do Senior Pastors Make The Best Mentors?